Speaking like a loon, fringe contender Manuel Charr said Monday he would scrap jackass Englishman David “The Hayemaker” Haye “on the moon” if that would ultimately secure a rematch against legendary WBC heavyweight titlist “Dr. Iron Fist” Vitali Klitschko.

The 41-year-old Klitschko (45-2, 41 KOs), who has never been floored and is the owner of the second-highest heavyweight knockout percentage in history (87.76%), bloodied and embarrassed Charr (22-1, 11 KOs) while waltzing to a fourth-round TKO victory on Sept. 8 in front of 30,000 spectators at Olympisky Sport Hall in Moscow.

The 32-year-old Haye (26-2, 24 KOs), an arrogant and unhinged degenerate who was reinstated to fight by the WBC in August, returned from “retirement” in July and earned an exciting fifth-round TKO triumph over Dereck “Del Boy” Chisora at the Boleyn Ground in West Ham, London.

"I am ready to fight David Haye anytime, anyplace - as long as I am guaranteed a title shot against Vitali Klitschko," said Charr, 28, a 6-foot-4 German of Syrian descent. "We can do the fight in England, in Germany, in Syria, Lebanon, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, the United States, Russia, China or even on the moon if he wants! Haye alone isn't interesting enough for me. I want to become WBC world heavyweight champion and I want to beat Vitali Klitschko. Haye is only a possible step on my way to this goal. It is not a goal just to fight David Haye."

Since having his right eye sliced open by “Dr. Iron Fist,” Charr knocked bush league prizefighter Konstantin Airich onto Queer Street in the first round of their bout on Dec. 22.

"Many people made the mistake to ignore me in the first place," said Charr. "I usually respond to this with a quote from Gandhi: 'First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win.’ It has been like this all my life and I'm sure it will be the same with David Haye. But I want to make one thing perfectly clear: For me fighting David Haye only makes sense if I get Vitali afterwards.”

Klitschko, a former mayoral candidate, who is 15-2 in world title fights, has watched UDAR dramatically ascend from a smalltime party into a political heavyweight in his native Ukraine.

The future of “Dr. Iron Fist,” who was sprayed with tear gas and suffered a gash on his right hand while protesting a Russian language bill on July 3 in Kiev, in the squared circle is entirely unknown.

Klitschko, the capturer of a silver medal as a super heavyweight at the 1995 World Amateur Championships in Berlin, has not been overcome since Lennox Lewis escaped by winning with an extremely controversial sixth-round TKO in June 2003.

Similarly, Haye, a past cruiserweight champ who prior to battling Chisora (15-4, 9 KOs) hadn’t fought since a pathetically pink showing against Vitali’s younger brother, Wladimir, in July 2011, also has zero professional plans to date.

Roger “Pit” Perron is a venerable boxing trainer from Brockton (Mass.) who now works with Mike and Rich Cappiello at their gym, Cappiello Brothers Boxing and Training.

Perron is confident that Klitschko would manhandle either Charr or the mouthy Haye.

“Haye and Charr are in over their head against Klitschko,” said Perron, 76, who worked with International Boxing Hall of Famer Marvelous Marvin Hagler. “He can’t mess with those monsters. Nobody can mess with either Klitschko.”

A bout pitting Haye against Charr could be somewhat entertaining and possibly even worth watching.

Unfortunately for the bloke and German, neither boxer would be able “to beat Vitali Klitschko.”